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Try matching pace and pressure with your fingers and tongue and then contrasting slow, firm strokes with your fingers and rapid flicks of the tongue. When you’re more than a few minutes into stimulating her, it’s nearly impossible to go too hard with a few fingers. Once you build intensity, slow way back down to how you started out and then quickly build back up.

Playing with differences in speed and pressure will give her stronger (and often multiple) orgasms.

If she’s a squirter, put down a sex blanket so that she can really let go without worrying about leaving a wet spot on the sheets. This leaves room for you to build the intensity and experience, much like a musician. The simplest, most on-point metaphor for this was given to me by an instructor of Tibetan Tantra.

Imagine that your sexual arousal is a pot full of water.

In my research for this article, it turns out that a lot of (i.e. One woman I interviewed even said, “With a lot of guys, I’d rather them just not.

Some men seem to be absolutely hopeless with oral sex.”A lot of guys see oral sex as a brief pit stop en route, rather than a main destination, so they don’t put much energy into honing their skills. Because if you put even a little bit of effort into sorting out your approach and technique, you’ll set yourself miles ahead of the pack.

Rhythmically massaging this area before or while using your tongue is a great way to stimulate blood flow and add to the fullness of sensation.

That said, the tip of the clitoris is definitely a magic sweet spot.

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There’s just something about the idea that sets me on fire, which has led me to talk with some experts and research various techniques over the years.

Give the little cutie the attention, love, and respect it deserves.

Warm her up by keeping your touch gentle and slow-motion.

Without wrapping around, simply place the thumb and index finger in the same place, on either side, with fingers also pointing downwards When you gently pull up and slightly outward, you’ll get maximum nerve exposure on the clit and start driving her wild.

There are other key internal erogenous zones (I’ll write a deep dive article on G-spot and cervical orgasms sooner than later), but a decent percentage of women can’t orgasm without some form of clitoral stimulation taking place.

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